Jane's Mindfulness Journal


Thursday, September 14, 2006


I have been working very hard to get my India Journals posted on my other blog, and in doing so, came across a post originally written just 3 years ago, but it is a channeling experience which is so relevant to my life today, I decided to post it here as well for all of you who are not subscribed yet to my India Journal blog to easily see.
If you would like to subscribe to my India Journal Blog and easily follow my past travels, as well as my upcoming trip (I am leaving on October 6th), then you can do so by going to the following link. Jane's India Journals
I have not as yet completed my past journals, and still have many photographs to add to the posts, but it will give you some general idea of what to expect in the future....hope you enjoy, and forgive me for neglecting this blog for now.

August 20th, 2003

Didn't take long to learn...just a little over 3 weeks and one day...

"THEY" have probably been wanting to tell me for ages, but knew it was
something I had to "realize" first on my own before they spoke with me....
and as usual, it is SOOOOOOOO obvious it is embarrassing to think it
took this long to figure it out!

I've already begun caring for myself as I know I must, yoga in the late
afternoon, and beginning my morning with full Reiki, sounds for my soul,
pranayama, yoga, meditation in the morning (missing a hot shower for my
joints but you can't have everything in this life)

So why did I have to be here in Kodai to get back to this? well...this
whole thing just flooded before me in neon light clarity...

WHENEVER there are others around, no matter who they are, my healing,
caring for, "worrying about" energies will ALWAYS go to "the others"
and be depleted before I get to myself.

The lesson, as channeled to me while just finishing writing the previous
post and still sitting in the internet cafe is:

Learn to reserve your energies for yourself as well. STOP denying
your OWN needs when confronted with others in your life. If the next
relationship you will be in (hopefully the final one) is to succeed
(with whomever it may be)... you must first understand that you must
never again "lezalzel" , belittle yourself and your needs...You know
this in your mind and would NEVER allow ANOTHER person to take advantage
of you, to take you for granted and to always place their own needs
above yours. So why do you continue to do it to yourself when in the
presence of the needs of others. You know it brings you to the point
of exhaustion and dysfuntionality (word?) each time both physically,
emotionally and spiritually, and yet you persist. DESIST!...Learn to
be with another, and still be completely with yourself as you must.
Do not automatically “DO” for another first, before you've taken care
of your personal health and spiritual needs. It will do no one any good
in the end. You know that for a fact and yet have not yet managed to put
it into action. It is very easy to put aside the couple of hours you need
a day for Jane, when only Jane is around-the hard part is doing it when
there is someone else in your life needing you. This is the lesson. Learn
it well or you will remain alone for the rest of your life to safeguard
yourself. You will be unable to live in good health, physically or
spiritually for any length of time if you do not care for yourself and
continue your self growth and inner quest...These are things which even
the most loving people cannot do for you and the more you will love,
the more you will "need to do" for this other person. There is enough
time in any day to "do for all" ...stop neglecting YOU in the overwhelming
need of yours to “be there always" for others. Allow another to BE with
you and still BE completely with yourself. This is the lesson. Learn it!
You do not have to BE by yourself to CARE for yourself.

This whole "admonishment"- "nu, nu, nu" part was channeled directly to
me while I was still writing. Realization was my own...THEY could not
just "tell" me this. I first had to realize it...it took an awfully
long time and a trip to India.

Ravin was part of their plan in this as well…

No one before has ever been so aggressively "nudnicky" with me in
the past and succeeded. Quite the opposite-it always puts me off-the
more someone insists, the more I do the opposite-he is definitely a
part of their plan!...

It's always been sooooooo obvious and yet I never saw the pattern
until just now! They have probably been wanting to tell me this for
ages but knew it would be ineffective until the "AHA!" first came
from me.

It's not just needing to "take care of" others. It's always accommodating
needs and wants of others before my own. As I am uncomfortable saying
"not yet-I haven't finished my yoga yet" or whatever...and always prefer
"going along with" rather than confronting even when I don't always
necessarily want what the other wants...I am easy to please...but
don't always please myself...

I have never been able to say "I can do anything you like provided I
have my 1 -1 1/2 hours of alone in the morning and one more hour in
the afternoon as sacred times for me”… with nothing urgent enough to
change that!

So, now that I have learnt that lesson...what else is in store for me....?

Again...time will tell. As always, my thanks for this enlightening
experience and my sincere request for guidance and the wisdom needed
to "activate" this newfound understanding in my daily life and in all
my encounters with others...no matter who they are...friends, relatives,
co-workers, etc.

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